When You’re in a Dark Place, What Do You Do?

When you fall into that deep, dark place, what do you do? Do you isolate yourself? Run back to old relationships? Fall into toxic habits or routines? Or is it a combination of all these? For me, it’s all of the above.

And the truth is—you never really see it coming, do you? One minute you’re fine, pushing forward, and the next, you’re drowning. It often hits when you’re completely off guard. That’s where I am right now while writing this.

To be fully transparent, I’m in a dark season in my life. My marriage is struggling. My relationships are strained. My finances are unstable. My dream feels further away than ever.

Now, I know what you might be thinking—”Things could be worse” or “At least you still have your health.” And you’re right. I try to be a man of gratitude, and I thank God every day for a new day and new opportunities. But if I’m being honest, even with that mindset, I still find myself feeling helpless when these seasons hit.

For someone who always has a smile on his face, who prides himself on being positive to the point where it annoys my wife, and who tries to see the bright side of everything, it confuses me how quickly I can fall into this dark place. And when I do, my first instinct is to isolate. I silence my phone. I disappear to a place where no one can find me.

I often pride myself on my ability to self-assess—to sit with my thoughts, process them, and find clarity. In fact, my content is built around helping introverts like me unleash their “inner heroes” and become the best versions of themselves. So, quiet space to think? I see it as gold. But complete isolation? That’s different.

With a wife and daughter depending on me, I’ve realized that disappearing isn’t just unhealthy—it’s damaging. Withdrawing might feel like a coping mechanism, but in reality, it only deepens the divide. And the truth is, the people who love you can’t help you if you keep shutting them out.

Here’s what I’m learning: You can sit with your thoughts without letting them bury you. You can protect your peace without pushing people away. And even when you feel like you’re barely holding on, there is still a way forward.

If you’re in a dark place right now, I get it. I’m there too. But if there’s one thing I know, it’s this—you don’t have to stay there.

I recently opened up more about this in a video called “I’m in a Dark Place… But I’m Not Giving Up“ where I share exactly how I’m pushing through this season while still trying to hold onto my dreams. If you’re struggling, I encourage you to watch it. Sometimes, just knowing you’re not alone can make all the difference.

Because no matter how heavy life gets, you’ve still got a fight in you. And you’re not giving up… not today.